I’m officially on summer break now, and my summer has started off on a very high note. I always have a list of projects that I plan on doing in the summer, and while I think that I am a pretty handy girl, I’ve always relied on my dad or whatever guy I’m dating at the time to help me out. As a matter of fact, that’s how I’ve been with most things in my life, especially decisions; always wanting other people to help me decide on major ones, or seeking the approval of others. So my first official feat of summer may not seem like a big deal, but the fact that I hung a ceiling fan in my bedroom, on my vaulted ceiling, all by myself, was just another reminder that I don’t need someone in my life to help me complete tasks and I can be self-sufficient. I don’t need a man to help me hang a ceiling fan (though standing on a ladder to dismantle was a bit scary and I even asked a friend to check on me every half hour to make sure I didn’t electrocute myself or fall to my death), and it felt really good to start my summer on such a high note.
On that note, I know I’ve devoted all of this blog to my dating life, and I’ve gone through some definite downers in the process. Don’t get me wrong, I have fun dating, but sometimes it is just so exhausting, it definitely feels like a job in and of itself and I sometimes just want a break from it. A friend has said to me that I should probably just quit trying, and while I don’t really want to do that, there are definite times when I start to wonder if I’m doomed to just be an ‘old maid’ and if I’ll be forever alone. But I’ve realized something lately, I’ve realized that I’m never really alone, I never have been. I have a couple quotes written on my bathroom mirror that I like to think about and yet sometimes I don’t even take in what it really says. One of the quotes says “Don’t be so preoccupied with what you don’t have that you don’t see what you do have. “ You see, I’m never going to be alone because I have the greatest friends in the world, who would never let me be alone.
As I’ve gotten older and virtually all of my friends have gotten married and have had kids I have to admit that I got nervous that things would change in our friendships. There have been times when I’m going through something, usually a break-up, and I didn’t want to bother my friends with my trivial problems, not when they had kids to handle and husbands to talk to. I even had on my to-do list to find some single friends this summer. But then, just like so often happens, I was reminded that what I really want was right in front of me. My summer so far has been full of fun times with my friends and their families; it makes me realize that I was silly for thinking that I was less important to them. True, their priorities are different and I may not get to talk to them or see them as much, but the fact is that no matter how much time we spend apart from each other, we’re always able to fall back into it. And I’m a lucky one, I still have friends from high school who I’m close to; my friend Joel and I have a standing dinner date every couple of weeks, sometimes with his wife and son, and sometimes just the two of us, and even though Joel acts like he’s tough, or even often like he’s an asshole, I know I can call him at any time and he’ll be there for me, sometimes even to sweep up broken glass and to teach me how to shoot a gun when I find out the guy I was dating was a lying narcissistic ass. I also went to the art fest with another high school friend, Kelly, and her family, who I always have a fun time with them.
Another amazing group of friends are my college girls. Most of us met freshman year of college, living in Mac East, and staying together the entire four years we attended university there. And no matter how far away we all live, we always manage to get together a couple times a year.
This is why I’ve had a lucky summer so far; first, my friend Amber and her family came into the area to camp, and I and another college friend Laura and her family went to hang out with them. So there I was, surrounded by three couples and their combined seven children, but I didn’t feel like I didn’t belong, I love being aunt Katie (though it is admittedly nice not having to deal with the kids when they get cranky or super hyper). And though we almost got attacked by a 4 foot rabid raccoon who wouldn’t get scared off even when shots were being fired at it (okay, that may be a bit of an exaggeration, but everyone knows I have a flair for the dramatic), it was a fun night were I got to see a bit of what the camping life would be like, though Amber’s camper is so nice I feel it’s about the same as staying in a deluxe hotel, besides having to walk to use a toilet.
And speaking of Laura, who moved to Columbus over a year ago which makes me just about the happiest friend, it’s so nice to have such a close friend close by, and I get to look forward to our Bachelor/Bachelorette viewing nights, made more fun by our bracket tournament; seriously, you should do it. A couple days after the camping adventure I got to see another one of my dear college friends when I crashed her family day at Kings Island. She also has two kids, and though I didn’t get to ride the big, scary rides that day, I had such a blast riding the more kid-friendly rides. When I went on the octopus-type ride with Krista’s young daughter, and it took off spinning and almost flipping us upside down, I instinctively put my arm around her, fearful that she would be scared, or worse fall out, but the sound of her giggling in delight throughout the ride made it just about my favorite ride of the day; and riding the roller coasters with my borrowed husband for the day, Zach, was a blast too. It’s these kinds of things that I’m talking about when I say I know I’m not alone, and I haven’t lost any friends just because they have husbands and wives and kids, it just means I’ve got an extended family now.
A few of my other groups of friends include my work friends, and I had a fun night out with some of my colleagues, though I suppose they’re my former colleagues now, at a teacher appreciation night out at a bar. We always have some super fun happy hours too, though those often have extended from the normal happy hours into all night excursions. I always look forward to my new friends in my book club group, some of them strangers to me when we first met but who I look forward to seeing every month for a couple hours of sharing good books, good wine and good stories. And finally, I can’t forget my ex-boyfriends who are still my friends. I know a lot of people find it odd, but I have some difficulty severing ties with some of the people I’ve dated. I find it hard to just end a relationship and completely quit caring about their well-being. So one of my bff’s right now is Bryan, who I called The Dentist, but now I feel he has moved from needed a nickname to being recognized as a full-fledged VIP in my life; I know if I need a fun night out, or boyfriend-replacement at an event, like going to watch a crew game with me and Laura and her family, even though he doesn’t like soccer; I know he’ll always be there for me, we definitely make better friends than dating couple.
So there’s my super fabulous summer so far, and the important realization that I am truly blessed to have such amazing people in my life, even though I don’t have that special someone right now, and I hope he is out there, I have a lot of amazing people in my life, and I know I can survive on my own; the ceiling fan proved that one, right? And I’m looking forward to the rest of what this summer will bring me, including a trip to the zoo tomorrow with my sister-in-law and adorable nephew, and Australia in a few days! So I’ll definitely have lots of stories to come, stay tuned!
